Top 15 Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single
Television, radio, and the Internet have been buzzing nonstop for years about the plight of single, black women looking for love, but what about all the single, black men? Nobody’s been bold enough to take a stand and speak out on behalf of all the good, single black men out there looking for love too. However, now, that’s all changed. The Victory Unlimited Show (victoryunlimitedshow.com) attacks this issue with the kind of guts, gusto, humor, and controversy that’s rarely heard in the mainstream media.
Based on feedback from the show’s fan base, the most recent broadcast entitled “The Top Twelve Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single” put forth the following list as the reasons why so many good black men are still unhappily single:
1. They keep meeting women with unrealistic expectations for what they want in a man.
2. They keep meeting women who put them in the wrong category by writing them off too quickly as not being “their type”.
3. They’re not wanted because they’re not needed. Too many women have told them that they don’t “need” a man.
4. They keep meeting black women who don’t respect them just because they “are” black men.
5. They keep failing women’s Girlfriend Approval Test. If the woman’s friends don’t like them, then that woman won’t give them a chance either.
6. They keep meeting women who are not interested in them, but only in how much money they make.
7. They’re nobody until somebody else loves them. Not enough women see them as a prize unless they see a lot of other women chasing after them first.
8. They meet too many women who don’t really know what they want.
9. They meet too many women who believe that single, good black men are “too good to be true”.
10. They’re the right man at the wrong time.
11. They meet too many women who don’t recognize a good man when they see one.
12. They don’t promote all the great things about themselves boldly or consistently enough to enough women.
13. He hasn’t found a woman that he felt strongly enough for to make him no longer feel the need to be single.
Reply With.
14. He’s having a lot of fun being single.
15. Instead of settling for a woman he can live with, his dream is to be with a woman he can’t live without.
You can add on 16.+
16. He’s Not A “Real Nigga”
LOOOL ole simp ass nigga
#1, 8-13 sum up why I’m single.
Erbody single cuz most of des women is hoes.
I think men AND women are too loose nowadays. People think its cool to sleep around so they never stop being in a “single” mindstate when they are in a relationship. Everbody as a whole just wanna live the IDGAF lifestyle.You got chicks on FB talking about they love to get ate by they men….wtf? When did that become a topic that you would put out in public domain?And then theres men thats on constant thirst mode.
I agree big Al.
The THIRST!!! That is a BIG problem…i will get into that more later.
I concur.
The problem why so many black men and women are single is because they’re not communicating properly, simple.
Nobody wants to tell the truth @truthatl, so there will always be a communication problem!!! How many people do u know are open about their flaws & shortcomings???? LOL not many right!!!
Good point!
16. Too concerned with “running game” or “pimpin” to allow ourself to actually like a woman.
17. We want to fukk everything in a skirt. Smashing is what we feel these hoes purpose is, so we don’t put the time in to get to know a bitch
18. We so caught up in the physical. Too busy callin hoes buttafaces or whatnot that we cannot see the inner beauty. Shallow Hal syndrome
19. Selfishness. Those that have a good bitch don’t care about satisfying her needs or wants. It’s all about me. I want, I want
20. Don’t really want to be in a relationship. Just want to live like Connor Mead because we think it’s cool to smash multiple women and think its simpish to stay faithful to one bitch. But we’re quick to call a woman a “ho” if she gets around like we do because our male ego is crushed
@hood, damn son u kept it 1000 LOL….I agree
Another good point to those who it applies too. I learned in my 30 years on this planet that if you have something good, don’t mess it up. Real Talk.
hood prophet you just told the DAMN truth bro some of the realist shit i ever heard on here in the last 3yr of being on this web site
Co-sign to the fullest.
@Hoodprophet homie u hit the nail in the coffin with your statement. a lot of dudes love the connor mead life. But in the end of running through a lot women it’s always going to be one that will reel you in. And it’s like Hahz, just commented below most guys can and will turn into a man @ an early age. I know I did I became one @ the age of 20. I always hung around older cats because I feel like it was a lot to learn from them. And it paid off for me eventually. And all these statements on why men are single are dead on the money. Especially 5-7 & 9 It’s funny how women don’t want something until someone else has it. Why is that ladies? That’s something that I never understood. If your not interested then ur not don’t want something because someone else has it. When I did came across a female like that i ahem to admit it but I treated her like crap because I already peeped game on what she was doing. I felt lie it was a gun fight hell I had to draw my weapon out and blast her before she blasted me. Crazy analogy but hell I’ll rather hurt her than her hurting me. But it’s alot of women out there that’s playing the game harder than us men. So as a man you really don’t know what to expect out of females these days. It’s sad to say but it is true. And the reason why most dudes are single because when he meets a female she has a man and she puts him down. That’s not cool if your in a messed up relationship why u can’t get out of it? Why u can’t have a clean slate?
And if a dude takes a chance on that chick that talks bad about her man guess what he just added himself to the problem. Not only does she has one to talk bad about she has two. Shame…..but most of these single men work with a bunch of women and when he see how they gossip and act there is no way in hell he would be able to take a relationship serious. Because he’s picking up on how women carry themselves around associates. Only thing I can say is that us men need to evaluate women before we climb in the bed with them. When you take things, serious u need to go slow. U really need to know,learn about your lover before u make a commitment. Also before u get intimate with one another both parties need to get tested before having intercourse. It’s a lot of damage being done without doing one. And the sad thing is that most people know that they have it and won’t even have the nerve to tell you. Folks being single is a good and bad thing. The good thing is that u don’t have to answer to no one. U don’t have to entertain anyone everyday and all day. But the bad part is that u might get lonely sometimes. All people get lonely so don’t get macho on me fella’s lol.
I hate this Ipad to many errors were made.
@850, ooh wee my man got that Ipad money lmao!!!!
B-strait what up homie. Seem like I got a nemisis. His name is buddy boy lmao. What kind of name is that? It’s some screen names I wouldn’t dare share when it comes down to blogging lol. & Buddy Boy is one of them.
LOL @850 aka Mr Ipad LOL, *850 voice*”hell yeah fool,Steve jobbs personally delivered my ipad before he passed….take that @buddy boy”…lmao!!!
lmao @ b-strait.
@Hood Prophet
Men who exemplify characteristics 16-20 don’t have a problem getting women.
Its men who exemplify the first 12 that do.
Damn….@HOOD…didnt kno you had that in ya fam…GOOD SHYT!
#4,#13,#1 #2
Is #4 a real reason? I doubt it. Black woman usually stick to black men. This list is missing a good one.
16. He keeps finding woman that are below his socioeconomic status. We call that slumming and I’ve done it a couple times, not on purpose, they were just cute chicks and dumb thick; had me picking her up in the projects. It’s difficult to clean a girl up or steer her right when her mother is just as rachet. You’ll leave frustrated before she realizes how good of a man you were and that she missed her opportunity to a better life.
except reason#4,10 &14, those can apply to 60% of brothas being single. Hood Prophet & Red Damn near sum-up’d anutha 15-20%. The rest are not capable of loving someone ’cause of extreme self-lothing or narcissus issues. Blaming women for 90% of these reasons are wrong, some men regardless of color, don’t love women right ’cause they grew-up in a enviroment where the women who raise them were treated like S*IT!
Now this is a deep post right here hahz,u should’ve held this one back until monday morning LOL. All of these reasons have some truth to them indeed.
Most dudes are single because i took their woman, cause little boys dont know how to listen,love,respect, and appreciate a real woman. Dudes are to busy trying to be macho, and while yall being macho i’m being black and mild (take notes kids)
LOL
Wow as a single female it is interesting to read this article.
Also the honesty in your comments is surprising…now if only you can be that honest with
the SBW
@sp there is a big difference between boys and men, have a conversation with a 20 year old and turn around and have the same conversation with a 40 year old MAN knowledge and wisdom wins every time
You can become a man in your mid twenties it’s all about what you been through in life and your level of knowledge.
16 cuz b13ches aint shyt and we aint shyt either lol you gon cheat or get cheated on eventually n b right back in that single life might as well jus b single focus on goals and jus have f^%k buddies For now
If “b13ches aint shyt” is your mind state then you will only manifest your destiny and attract b1tches that ain’t shyt in your life.
The universe is a magnet what your think about all day is what you attract and what you become.
yall need to reaf “THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING”….Norman Vincent Peele
Interesting… It seems like the reasons are placing more of the blame on the opposite sex. When there’s a one like this pertaining to women the article normally isn’t hesitant to place some of the blame on the woman herself opposed to blaming the opposite sex. I just found that really interesting. I think the reason a lot of black men and women are single is because WE REFUSE TO LOOK IN THE MIRROR. It’s simple PEOPLE ATTRACT WHAT THEY ARE. If you want a certain mate or partner do some self evaluation, make some changes and go back at it. You just can’t be a half assed idividual and expect gold to fall in your hands for free, doesn’t work like that. Like most parts of life you have to work for everything you got including life long love.
Agreed lady!!!
I disagree. If you read the headline, it clearly states “…why so many good Black men are still single.” So, the list is “assuming”, all things being equal, that a certain segment of Black men are determined to be “good” according to a particular standard. Based upon that, this list, while being generalized, is indeed correct. So ultimately, it will appear to place the blame on the opposite sex. It’s the same when the media blasts for all the public to see “Why so many good, educated, Black women are single.” The results “appear” to put all of the blame on Black men. The main problem I see is people who come from a low class or working class background, who make moves and decisions to move up in social class, are still hard-wired to choose mates who have similar backgrounds, although they made “different” choices when deciding to either break the cycle or to continue in the same cycle.
#16 They single b/c they be bussin, and wanna find a man when they tired of gettin it in themselves
I ain’t single I got a thorough broad inside out 8.5 9 on god cooks clean off the chain in the sack sloppy dome down to earth been with her 5 yrs plus and I’m still miserable relationships are overated and the saying is true for every bad chick you see it’s n*gga behind her tired of f*cking her Think about how many chicks you approached on some grown respectful sh*t only to turn you down to chase some broke lame that she got kids with or been on and off with for 10 yrs and he dont even want the b*tch moral of the story stop putting bad b*tches on a pedestal stop giving a f*ck and b*tches will flock to you
Bruh, don’t U know what the purpose of punctuations R for, reading Ur statement gives me a headache…
Well in our community women that been put on a dime status pedestal feel like they don’t have to bring anything to the table until they start seeing there looks fade away.
Other races are still getting married as soon as they graduate college usually mid twenties. Black men don’t have too many friends aspiring them to get married and settle down like other races do. White peoples parents pressure their kids to do two things go to college and find a good wife.
If your mom never was married or in a long term relationship and your father wasn’t around who is going to teach you how to be a good partner in a relationship?
Amen to that Hahz.
So…. don’t perpetuate the situation, encourage your kids to get an education, get married, have a solid family foundation?!
I’ve been in a relationship with my lady for over a year now, but prior to that I was single for a long time. In my case the reason was that I refused to settle for the B.S. You can call it being picky because I could of wifed plenty of chicks, but if you’re not a good fit for me then whats the point? Not being concieted, but if you dont bring the same thing i’m bringing to the table, then I’m not messing with you. No drama, got your own money, good head on your shoulders, have some ambitions in life?…… ok now we can talk! I need to be able to build with my lady, we have each others back in any situation, I think that’s whats lacking in alot of relationships, it starts off on the physical, and slowly it’s realized that the deeper aspects of a quality union are lacking.
Me to a T. Good post!
Let me ask your opinions. I had this high school sweetheart where nothing in the world could separate us. Ambitious chick, educated, and a family woman. We broke it off because of differences. So about 10 years later now, she holla’d at me last month. Butttttt she got a jit. So should or shouldn’t I fucks with that?
depends on what you want… if you want the baggage and whatever other drama she has going on then by all means jump in. Dont let the past gloss over whats going on in the present player. 10 years is a long time, and i’m willing to bet you are both differnet people then when you were together.
Ooh wee check out @malleg’s LOL,….church!!!!
That certainly is true…10 years and a person can be totally different.
But doesn’t that beg another question. If a person can CHANGE over time, why are we committed to that same person FOREVER (in marriage)
@Mike I say go for it homie.
From what I’ve seen there is a problem when a woman has been single and on her own for a while. When she meets a man she still wants to wear the pants and try to run the man. Women dont know how to play their part unless it’s time to pay bills. Then he can gladly be the man of the house.
That is the RIGHT on THE MONEY
Preach
7-15 sums it up for me. Woman not knowing what they want is the teeth cracker there. BTW, #16 She has kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don’t have any so I don’t want to be bother with any one else’s. It may sound selfish but a lot of single woman with kids say they don’t want any more. To me, that selfish in it self because I don’t have kids and would like to have some someday.
I Personaly dont believe in love… Its a mind thing to me. These hoes cheat Like its the right thing to do.. I Cant go threw that shit no mo fam
Lmao @ Juice it’s sad but you’re telling the truth. Females can have a good man and still cheat on him. It’s crazy homie. I knew a female friend of mine that has a good dude @ the crib. This crazy heifer was talking about stepping out on him. I mean cat go to work everyday take his kids. Pay bills everything. And hearing stuff like that tells me that women don’t want the good in life they like drama and problems. If your friends going through problems and ur the only one that doesn’t have them (Man problems that is) why go out and do something stupid? Just so u can blend in with your buddies? Smh I tell you the movie “Unfaithful” will always be in the back of mind lol.
i feel ya
I’m single b/c I like the “new car excitement” u get those first 1-2 months. Not always sexual but just that whole newness in the beginning excites me. After that I slowly but surely lose interest
Most Black Women BELIEVE that most Black Men DO NOT BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE!…THAT THE REAL REASON WHY GOOD BLACK MEN ARE SINGLE!
Why does this issue only pertains to “black” people” I rarely hear the term “why white people are single”, or “there are no good white men”? But I digress.
I think both black men and black women want mates that are “out of their league” per se. But there’s a difference. Usually men were the were the superficial ones, but over time women started adapting men ways when it came to dating, but men don’t alienate women out of their social circle if she doesn’t meet a certain standard.
Men would still maintain friendships or maintain social interactions with women they have no interest in but won’t exclude. However with most women, if you’re not good looking, make a certain type of money, etc, etc, then she’s not talking to you, being cordial, or interacting with you on any level.
And most times dudes make the mistake of correlating a woman’s character with her socioeconomic status. Most times dudes steretype women by their dress, profession, etc, etc, and it always backfires.
Right. I never hear the terms, “good” or “educated” when discussing white relationships or those of any other race.
@Prince Thank You!!! Although there are subtle differences, white people go through the same ish, they just don’t make a big deal out of it like we do.
White people are not the standard know body is and futhermore whites have a high divorce rate and think marriage is over rated and it is not ever body is supposed to be married but need sexual healing
Real Talk.
Now post like these or similar, should be the ones, that should hit the 200 plus comments.
LOL, I bet the unrealistic expectations means: Wanting a man who has a decent job who doesn’t cheat. ALL Men (including black) are single because they want to be, not because of any other reason, especially any of the ridiculous reasons stated in this article. All this shows is that “there is always going to be an excuse for them doing the things they do”.
Good Luck,
Lacey
How could I woman tell a man why he is single? No one I know that is single wants to be,they just have a hard time finding a equal.
So Lacey tell me this, why are most black men single? So every reason that was listed is an excuse to you? How can u say that? I know a homie right now that wants to be married and have kids. He’s about to die if he doesn’t gets his wish soon. Everything that was listed on this list is accurate. So the reason why women are single are a bunch of lies to right?
the thing is girls like only male models of any race but will call you a bitch ass nigga if you dont think every woman deserves a pitch. so you have to be really gorgeous to them or rich or something else to make up for them settling with you for not being gorgeous. im smart
This is soo idiotic. It’s like being in a grocery store and starving yourself to death. How can the “good black man”, or whatever category you place a black man nowadays, be single? Black women outnumber black men 10 to 1 ratio, and in education. And what exactly is a “good black man” anyway?
850 take a. College course and write a paper we don’t want to read all that sh#t.
@Buddy Boy got get laid u lame ass b##ch N$$%a. I see why ur single because ur an idiot!! Take notes from the wise u might learn something dumb ass Lame lmao. Where do you come from any punk? Go back to ur low life and kill urself.
Lmfao @850, take it easy sir LOL. Man for some reason the last couple of months dudes been gettin disrespectful on ans *shrugs* we need to go back to how it was around here LOL
@ B-strait man I don’t know where these cats come from. I think it be some wolf pack members going under another screen name to express how they really feel. But yeah Hahz, need to start ambering alert a Mf when he does it. This is ridiculous. I hope i’m wrong about the comment i made regarding to the Wolfpack fam.
LOL @850, yeah I hope it ain’t no phony dudes in the Wolfpack like that LOL. It’s a few clowns tho…..like @flapjack petey wit his jealous azz LOL
Naw I have no beef with Pete. It’s that cat name buddy boy a.k.a Sammy89,Bigbooty lover, and other Alias names he uses.
LOL,its all good tho. I’m not gon lose no sleep over all this nonsense LOL
Me neither bruh, it’s funny to me lol.
go get laid (Damn Ipad) that’s what i meant to say.
This is toward Luther from set it off. (Buddy Boy)
we are both guilty but you never hear a brotha say that all black women are no good or that I can never find a black woman or that there is a shortage. As black men we are more maligned and labeled by our woman then any other ethnic out there. No Good black men out there? Seriously? I’m sure there are a few on thats posting to this right now. Sure we have our faults and we admit it but black women these days want to play the pity party and not own up to any shortcomings in relationships. Its always our faults. I can only imagine how many women you may have came across kicked you to the curb based on this litany list before they found how you are as a person. As men yes we get blinded by the booty but we do give you a benefit of a doubt something that we do not get the privilege of getting in return.
a lot of cats got f#ked over by feminism and the other manifestations of emasculation movement!!! Im an advocate for sufferage, rights etc… but, women are to much in awe of themselves to bond with a man in a relationship that transcends superficial it seems.. example, last night I was at a young ladys house with my guy friend and he noticed that her kitchen trash was over flowing, so he offered to take it out for her, so she says, “no thats alright Ill take it out myself”… and as we were leaving the house and I was walking out the door I noticed that he was holding the door open. Long story short, when a man holds the door open for a woman she/takes out the trash they are validating each others sexuality… By her refusing his offer to take out her trash, and him actually holding the door open for another fully grown man is sort of a micro example of how the male/female relationship has been sabotaged through the perversion of basic principles. But blacks family structure has been target of this for centuries. Was not accidental either. Uncle Tom, slavery, jim crow is a prime example of the black familys being eroded and black man in particular being emasculated/persecuted by American/White Supremacist society as “price for its salvation”. That is my insightful speech for today. Documented here @ atlnightspot
My friend is married with 2 kids btw…
also didnt Osiris get his cock chopped off???
Osiris Dick Removal=genocide
Honestly, I agree with some of the thinking. I mess around with black females, but they’re usually not interested for petty reasons and it’s not like I really care because there’s nothing I can do about it. I see the type of guys they want and I’m not usually they’re type, like I’m never good enough…lol. All good to me, do you. They be the ones hollerin about a dude doing this, a dude doing that, cheating, etc… and I’m like wtf you expect. To the ones that become happy, cool
I think one important reason is because they want to be. There are a lot of fine, respectable sisters out there looking for a decent, hard-working guy that will treat them right and have a sense of commitment. I really don’t think it’s that hard to find a good woman personally. But I’m single and not looking/dating or anything, so what do I know…….lol
number 7 is the best on hereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
my sex life is political
One thing that was left off the list was,A lotta men might be single becuz they suffer from micro penis(I swear i ain’t tryin’ to be funny fella’s),but every single woman i have ever been with were so happy with THE D,that they had to tell me their lil penis horror story’s,and these were story’s of meeting men that they thought were perfect until they pulled out their sh!t,men that they said were gentlemen,good lookin’,had good job’s,etc…,but that sh!t went out the window when they seen they were inadequate,I’m tellin’ u,hittin’the bottom of that pu$$y goes a long way,just like some men put up with a lot of bullsh!t from women if they have big tits, a fat azz,good pu$$y,or head,etc…,same goes for women,fu@k the dog sh!t out of ‘em,and see how long you’ll be single then…lol
LOL
On the real., most “good” people are single because they do not know where to look to find a common mate. When was the last time you checked a college campus? Not all students are undergrads and not all undergrads are between 17-22. And far as a man is concerned, if you are under 35 and you so happen to meet a 21 year old, what she lacks in experience, she may make up for in maturity.
Black man aint got a black woman cuz society doesnt want that to happen. they dont want that union its to powerful. imagine if all the hoods had happy homes. c’mon son its divide and conquer.
In ATL,
the odds are against you if …
you are college educated
speak proper english
Have ambition
drive a average car
Do not live the “hip hop” lifestyle
have morals
It is still easy to score but I can honestly say that I have been turning a lotta shiiit down.
**its called restraint…get some**